If you feel stuck while you watch everyone else advancing forward, it’s kinda depressing.
How can you be like them?
For starters, here are some lies that you need to stop telling yourself:
You can change people.
You can’t. You don’t have the inherent power to do that.
If there’s something that you don’t like about someone, it’s better to try to understand. Accept them for who they are. Don’t waste your time and effort on changing other people when they themselves have no intention of changing.
If it’s not perfect, it’s a complete failure.
Don’t beat yourself up.
When you constantly strive for perfection, you’re setting the bar too high for yourself. We are all flawed, we are all trying. The pursuit for perfection should not be the decisive factor in your life. Just give it your all, move forward, and remember you can’t always hit the 100%.
It’s too late for you.
Have you ever felt discouraged after thinking that it’s too late?
The truth is, it’s never too late for you. Don’t let societal influences and standards guide your timeline. Remember, you are your own person, and you’re allowed to follow your own path at your own pace. Don’t feel the need to restrain yourself because of arbitrary timelines.
You can accomplish things at your own pace.
You lack or don’t have the willpower to accomplish anything.
Have you ever looked at a successful person and thought to yourself, “Wow. I can never do what he/she does. I don’t think I have it in me.” You might be using this thought process as an excuse to give in to certain pressures easily.
For example, you want to form a habit of waking up early, but you use the lack of willpower as an excuse to sleep in. You just prevented yourself from forming a healthy habit.
Big or small changes in life can be hard. But once you start, willpower, integrity and strength will grow. What you need to do is set changes to your environment to be able to reach success.
If you want to get up early, make sure you give yourself enough time at night to wind down before sleeping. Like for example, reducing time spent on electronic devices right before bedtime.
This might be just a small change to your environment, but this can set you up for success. Small changes can create a huge impact in the long run.
You are not good enough.
Was there something that you wanted so deeply to achieve but didn’t because you weren’t confident in your abilities? Thinking you can’t ace an exam because you’re not smart, thinking you can’t find a partner because you believe you’re not attractive enough — when you have low self-esteem, your self-worth is minimized.
To combat this issue, make a list of your strengths and weaknesses. Then, figure out ways to refine your strengths while realizing that your weaker traits do not always have to be on display. And that those sum up to the whole YOU. You just have to accept and acknowledge all that.
You don’t have enough to be happy yet.
How often do you spend time thinking about something you could have gotten but didn’t?
A career advancement. A car. An apartment. A new phone. A professional license.
Drowning in what ifs can make it hard to see the bigger picture. When you do this, your focus is centered on what you don’t have instead of what you actually have. Stop obsessing over things that you don’t have and don’t let yourself get distracted from the present.
If you feel like you don’t have enough to be happy, it’s time to make a conscious effort to be more mindful and appreciative of what you have.
Instead of thinking about wanting a new car, be thankful for the car you have that gets you to your destination. Instead of obsessing over moving into your dream home, appreciate the roof you’re living under that’s comfortable and warm.
When you shift your mindset onto what you actually have, you get less distracted and you stay more positive. Thus, things become clearer, like for example, where you’re meant to be headed.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t dream big, because you should. But give yourself an allowance for mistakes, and understand the reality that not everything you want would come along easily. What I’m saying is, while you work hard to get what you want, appreciate the things that you actually have.
So, which lie have you told yourself over and over? How do you plan to change that? The start is always the hardest, but it’s better to spend your time DOING than WORRYING.