the past is not your fault

But how you move forward from that is your responsibility.

Over the past few months, I’ve drowned myself in thoughts that led me to depression and solitude. My smiles were minimal, my interactions were selective. And rather than telling people how I felt, I just kept it to myself. Explaining was so exhausting and revisiting the past just to make other people understand was draining. So, I kept it all to myself.

Yet I realized, what happened to me was not my fault. It was unfair, it wasn’t something I deserved, and it wasn’t something that I asked for. We are all hurt by life, wrongdoings, unprocessed pain and sidelined emotions. It’s not every day we get to be handed a deck of cards that creates the winning hand. Sometimes, we just lose.

I’ve come to understand that healing is my responsibility. If I keep this unprocessed pain, it would infect other people. It would get transferred from one heart to another, and I cannot allow this to happen.

Healing is my responsibility because I only got this one life. I only got one shot to make things different. I don’t want to sit around and wait for other people to make me okay. I should rise and transform, and believe I got the inner power to do so.

In life, we are not meant to be unscathed. We are not meant to be unscarred. Life hurts us in different ways, and how we respond and who we become determine whether trauma becomes a tragedy or the beginning of a story of how a victim became a hero.

I’m looking forward to a lot of things in the remaining months of 2021! My birthday is coming up soon, and December is just around the corner. I’ll be back with new inspiring blog posts before the year ends.

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